Are You Accidentally Torturing Your Freshly Sober Loved One?

Three things absolutely not to say and what to try instead.

People seemed surprised when I first admitted that not only was I not-drinking, but I was getting sober. As in, seeking-help-to-continue-not-drinking-getting-sober.

Sometimes they were surprised because I’d never really drunk with them and so they had little idea of my love affair with booze. Sometimes they were surprised because I had drunk with them, and the transition seemed unnatural. And sometimes they were surprised because I had drunk less than they did and they had no intention of quitting so why on earth would I?

Believe me, it wasn’t an easy decision to make. I spent years trying not to make it. My dream was to drink without the negative consequences. To drink moderately, on special occasions. I just couldn’t manage it.